VALERIE JEFFORDS

Q. If you could have one gigantic billboard with anything on it, what would it say and why?

"Onward, onward, forward, toward..."  

While driving across the US from North Carolina to California with friends during my college years, we had a system in place to stay alive and remember our journey.  The driver couldn't sleep (a good rule). The front passenger couldn't let the driver sleep (another good one).  When rotated to the backseat we had to write a journal entry before being allowed to fall asleep.  A friend wrote a poem he thought was so profound at the time while the others of us laughed, thinking he was such a jokester.  A few years later, I found the journal and the 'poem' and he was right! I have used his wise words as a reminder that we are on a progressive journey.  If we keep working to move forward in life, but without asserting too much control around our destination, we might just find ourselves both able to be fully present and pleasantly surprised by the experiences we travel through.

Q. In a different world, let’s say in a parallel universe, what would your alternative career be? Why?

I would have been a pioneer and influential musical mega-star like Madonna.  A vivacious and talented innovator, singer, songwriter, producer, dancer, and entertainer with a single word name (of course) that paved the way for independence and expression for creative artists in the music industry.  Perhaps I would have selected a slightly different 80’s wardrobe, but you get the point.  Singing, performing, and on stages in front of large audiences around the world, inspiring people to dance, laugh, and sing out loud together.

Q. In the last five years, what new belief, behavior, or habit has most improved your life?

Several years ago, I saw a t-shirt walking down my street. Yes, I said t-shirt.  I have no recall of the human inside it; I just remember the shirt. It read:  LIVE SLOW.  Being an exceedingly high energy, highly active, high functioning human for so many years, I was not so keen on entering a day with low expectations of accomplishment or activity.  However, as I grew "wiser" I realized my energy output was an unsustainable expense and it didn't benefit my daughters' experience of me either.  So, with the motivation of a t-shirt, I began to give myself more grace, to slow down my days, and insert more time for contemplation, self-reflection, mindfulness meditation, quality time with people I love, and simply finding joy in sitting and observing (and oh, more sleep).  The reminder to LIVE SLOW has helped me shed some overflowing cortisol and I've become kinder to myself.